TheRealSharon's Blog

There’s something that’s been floating around in my head these past few days and it’s about couples that exemplify marriage in one way or the other. Whenever I think about friends and family and their marriages, it seems like a majority of them fit within two different extremes.

Of course, this is coming from the female side….but I’ve noticed that women either tell ALL the bad about their spouse, and seem to leave nothing out, to the point of TMI or they just emphasize the good and not really bring up the bad at all to the point where you think they must have the perfect marriage. Notice I said a majority, cause I’m sure someone will point out knowing people who fit neither of these. I just really think there’s not many people out there that show the middle of these two extremes.

I’m sure we all know women who bash about their men publicly all the time and are always talking about what their man did now. Then I’ll see the comments from others not giving advice as must as suggesting they leave their man. This has pretty much taught me that you probably don’t want to air ALL your grievances in marriage publicly, because it seems like a lot of people think the cure for ALL marital problems is automatically divorce. Not that I’m Anti-Divorce cause there are a lot of reasons why I think it’s needed, but I don’t think it’s needed in every situation.

Then there are the women who are always posting about the sweet things their man does and you NEVER see anything negative about their marriage posted. Some would say that’s a good thing because it should be kept private while at the same time, other women tend to either wrongly idolize that person’s marriage as perfect(when I can pretty much guarantee it’s NOT always) or they feel jealous and wonder why their husband’s not like that….which is kind of holding him up to a possibly false ideal? I mean, just cause someone posts only the good doesn’t mean there is never any bad, right?

The problem comes in when you look at the two extremes and wonder where’s the example out there that speaks the truth?

Unless you’re in an abusive relationship, I would like to truly believe that no marriage is either ALL bad or ALL good, but when you see people seeming to just point out one side or the other, you almost start to see YOUR marriage as kind of an oddball.

This is how I feel, honestly. Especially since I’m married to a Bipolar man and I suffer from Depression myself. I feel like a liar if I point out only good, because I openly blog about this and how will other women newly married to a bipolar spouse feel if I act like it’s all roses? Will they think that their husband doesn’t HAVE to have his mood swings at times? Will they think their spouse acts the way he does ONLY because of them and not because of their disorder? Will they falsely believe that someone who is Bipolar can seriously go through life as a perfect man when guys that AREN’T can’t? I feel like it’s being fake to pretend that being married to my husband isn’t hard at times. As it is, I feel like I don’t really have anyone in my exact position to talk to about things and feel like I’m not the only one in my position.

Then I read things talking about how a married couple should never yell at each other and I think that’s completely ludicrous! In that case, a lot of people should split up right?! Who doesn’t EVER yell at the other at least once in their marriage when arguing? And in the case of being Bipolar, it’s unrealistic. It’s like saying Bipolar people or Depressed people should never marry….Why? Don’t people with Mental Health Disorders deserve love too? Yes, yes, they do. Not everyone can handle living with someone that has one. I have definitely figured that out….I have been asked before how I can handle the outbursts. Well, it’s not easy but it helps to actually spend time LEARNING about Bipolar Disorder and how it works. You have to understand how it effects people and I think you figure out what love really is. I do not think a marriage with one or both people that suffered from a mental health disorder can ever work if both people aren’t truly in love. Not puppy love, but completely 100% unconditional love.

Which is why more people, not just people in my type of marriage, need to maybe be a little more honest. I’m not saying to let the other person’s every crime out in public, but be more honest about what marriage REALLY is like. The honesty of my marriage is that my husband can get mad about little things and yell about them, he can say things he doesn’t mean when he gets upset, he tells inanimate objects that he wants to kill them, he swears far more than I would like, he smokes as a stress reliever, and he can act like a 2 yr. old at times. I’m just being honest…..but the good side is he has never laid a hand on me, he always apologizes, he hardly ever truly means anything bad he says, others say he says ONLY says wonderful things about me to them, he puts up with my hatred of cooking and my overemotional side, he gives great teddy bear hugs and I have NEVER felt at one moment in my marriage that he would EVER really leave me. I have never felt more confident in a man’s love for me than I do with him.

The marriages out there where the couple supposedly fights…I’m not jealous of that. I actually feel bad because I think it’s not real. I think every couple needs to argue at times, in the healthiest way possible, but they need to. Pretending that everything is always perfect and never disagreeing is only going to end up bad, if you ask me.

My marriage with a Bipolar man in which we do have arguments but we still say “I love you” 100 times a day…..I really think MY marriage is something to want and cherish. Not that you should go out and look for someone with Bipolar Disorder or Depression, but I mean, as far as the example of really and truly loving the other person for who they are, 100%, the good and bad, happy and sad, getting through the hard stuff and you’re still standing strong, in love as much as ever. I think the fact that me and him have been married for almost 4 years and together for over 5 and haven’t killed each other is a great example of true, unconditional love.

So here’s to people who are more honest about their marriage!

{March 2, 2013}   Date Day Posting

Posting this in the middle of my Date Day so this will be short and sweet. Today is my first official Date Day in months. Even though I spend all the time practically with my husband living together, it’s fun to go on special dates like you went on when you were just boyfriend and girlfriend, you know? My last date day was planned a couple weeks ago but I ended up sick so I was super excited for today. 🙂

Breakfast together, then off to the movies to see “Dark Skies” which surprisingly made me jump a few times. Must be something to do with the Alien theme? Honestly, I was raised on Monster movies and not many creepy alien ones so Aliens still seem to scare me, I guess. I thought the movie was pretty creepy and also good. You can find out my rating later when I post it on my 50 movies in 2013 page! 🙂

After the movies, we used a Chili’s Gift Card from Christmas to get some lunch and yes, I took a free day today so I ordered Pasta for the first time in a LONG time and I have plenty of leftovers. Then we came home and played some Scene It on the PS3…my husband beat me, of course! 😦

The rest of our day was supposed to be playing board games and maybe watching shows on the DVR, BUT turns out tonight is an A.C. Singers concert(which is a singing/dancing group I was in about 7 years ago…has it been THAT long? wow!). I’ve missed the past couple years cause I always forget to check and they change the dates every year… I am excited to go tonight! We are taking my Mom with us, too, though, (my idea) cause she loves these concerts and I know she doesn’t get to do as much since she is living with my Nanny and taking care of her all the time.

So…off I go to get ready for the concert, then maybe me and the hubby will watch some DVR shows to end our Date Day off nice! 🙂

{February 23, 2013}   Life isn’t a Fairy Tale

The first definition of a “Fairytale” is just what it sounds like, a story about fairies told to amuse children. The other definition given is an interesting but highly implausible story, often told as an excuse; as in when someone makes up a story to get out of something, for example. The very definition of the word tells you that it’s something fictional and not real yet from the time we are little girls we believe in a day where we can run off, get married and live like in a fairytale. The whole idea sounds lovely, but if you look at the examples from most fairy tales, are they really that ideal? Something horrible usually happens before the supposed happily ever after which seems to be the key thing we dream of. We all want our “Happily ever after”, never considering that this lovely ending in fairy tales could just be a clever way to say “The End” while making you feel all happy inside.

Now let me first clarify that this is NOT coming from a scorned woman who feels like she missed out on her fairy tale. I am happily married and I love my husband very much. I believe in the power of love and I believe that two people can stay in love throughout their marriage, go through the bad and come out better and grow old together. I simply disagree with the notion that life can be a great big fairy tale.

Let’s look at the elements OF a fairy tale. They always start with “Once upon a time”. Well, in that way, I guess we can agree. All our lives started once at some time or the other. Secondly, you always have a hero/heroine and a villain. Well, in real life, there are many villains all around you. Some people have more villains in their paths than others; some get conquered by a hero or heroine, even if just metaphorically speaking; others aren’t so lucky and lose out. Good doesn’t always win over evil in real life.

Third, we have magic. I believe a little in the supernatural and that we have a type of magic or power within ourselves, but I don’t believe people can turn an actual pumpkin into a carriage or that mice I encounter will talk to me and then sew me a dress. If there are mice that can do this and I am unaware, PLEASE let me know! Then…we have royalty usually in some way. We definitely still have kings, queens and princesses around as shown by the royal wedding, BUT the royalty of 2013 is very different from what it was when fairy tales were first told. In fact, WHEN they were first told, it wasn’t all rainbows and butterflies then! A queen was more liable to get her head cut off than be happy with her king, who was probably bedding several mistresses right in front of her!

Next, fairy tales always have some kind of problem and solution. In this case, I can relate but real life seems to have never ending problems and the solution doesn’t come from magic. Real life is tough and while it’s nice to believe you can just be happy forever and never be sad, angry or hurt again, it’s not true. You DON’T get married and then everything be sunshine from then on. Things are going to happen, LIFE happens. You can’t avoid that fact.

Lastly, fairy tales always have some kind of lesson, with the main one usually that good conquers evil. Ah, fairy tales, how I envy that good always wins out in you! If only in real life good could always win. If only sickness would always lose, if people wouldn’t ever hurt you, and you wouldn’t have to face death. But life isn’t a fairy tale.

Having said what I don’t agree with, I will now say that I still appreciate fairy tales also for what they are. Fairy tales give people hope, which is something hard to always keep in this day and age. Hope is important to have regardless of the situation. It’s good to believe the best of mankind and hope that in the end, good WILL win out, even when it doesn’t.

Life ISN’T a fairy tale but it IS a story. A story that YOU fill out by every step you take, every word you say and everything you do each day. You have the power (or magic) to decide how you’re going to deal with what life throws you and what people will say when they read YOUR story. So while your life may not read as a fairy tale, you can still let your life read as a GOOD life well lived. A life of someone who tried to do what was right, who loved whole heartedly, and tried hard to make this world the type where good DOES win out in the end.

First of all, the 19th was mine and my husband’s anniversary. It was a good one and I am excited for many more! We had a gift card to Olive Garden but we didn’t end up eating there. Right as we got there and walked in, the power went out! I was actually surprised to see my reaction was laughter about the situation. All the restaurants and stores in that area had a power outage too, so we just decided on a whim to head for another town close by and try an Italian restaurant we had been dying to try for the first time. Right as we got into the restaurant, we found out the power in Olive Garden had JUST come back on. It seemed like fate to me. The other restaurant, called Antipasta’s was awesome, had delicious food and ended up being cheaper than Olive Garden would have been (without a gift card) so it was well worth the drive.

Yesterday was the first day of my new healthier life. It was hard but I feel like I have got this new found motivation I didn’t even think I had in me. Between meals, me and my husband went to play Mini Golf (which I hadn’t played in years). It was so much fun, but I am thankful there were benches nearby and we brought big bottles of water with us! After bending down so much to get the ball, my back was yelling at me and I was feeling really out of shape. I think more than fatigue, I just had to rest frequently due to feeling faint and my hands shaking, which I KNOW had to be due to blood sugar. I am NOT diabetic at the moment, I just had blood work done last week, but it runs in my family and my dad is hypoglycemic so I think I might have to figure out exactly HOW to best eat to keep my blood sugar from getting too low, you know? Before, unless I went hours without eating, it was never much of an issue because I was eating a lot of carbs that were probably fueling me with bad glucose? Now I am eating more fruits and veggies versus bread and pasta, but maybe I am not getting enough. This is kind of new to me, so I think I am just going to have to again, take it day by day and figure it out.

Yesterday as I was eating fat free yogurt for breakfast and not exactly digging it, I started to say something positive I wanted before each bite. For example, “I want to be healthier”, “I want to feel better”, etc. and before you know it, I was finished and found a LOT of inspiration for losing weight. I have decided to make short term goals and long term goals to aspire to. My first short term goal is to lose 50 pounds by Christmas but my real incentive there is to fit into my dress I wore for engagement pictures by Christmas. I was about 50 pounds lighter then and I would really love to fit that dress again! So now I have a pound goal but also a visual goal to aspire to and I really feel like it is certainly possible!

My first long term goal doesn’t have a “pounds” attached to it, but it’s something I want to accomplish by May. A couple years ago, when my niece Sara graduated, I was unable to sit further down in the stadium with the rest of my family because my butt was too big for the chairs. Therefore, me and my husband sat at the top in folding chairs. It really made me sad, though I just laughed it off about “my big butt”. This May, my niece Grace will be graduating high school at the same place and I want so badly to sit with my family this time. I’m tired of having to find somewhere to sit and sitting off by myself, feeling like a loner. I feel like I can also conceivably make this goal and I can already see the excitement on my face when I get there!

On another note, I am suspending my “12 in ’12” challenge because I feel like I already have one big challenge I am committing to, that is frankly, a lifetime challenge. Having a thyroid disorder means even after losing all the weight, I will STILL have to stick to a healthy lifestyle to avoid going back. I have lost a good bit before and I gave up when I got stuck….and now I am right back where I was and then some. I don’t want to go down the same path again. I have added two weight loss tickers on the side of my blog, one with my short term goal and one to just show my progress throughout my whole journey. I will keep updating you at least once a week and I already appreciate all the tips, advice, support and kind words that have come my way!


As always, you may answer these questions in your own post or in the comments section!

This 5 Question Friday was brought to you by:

On to the questions!

1. Are you a napper? Yes, I love napping! 🙂

2. What was your favorite subject in school? Most hated? My favorite subject was English and then Choir class the years I did Choir….Most hated was always P.E. with Math coming in close second

3. Did you have the something old new borrowed and blue at your wedding? What were they? Yes, but for the life of me, I don’t remember what I had for blue!…..Ugh, I hate when I forget stuff! The something “old” was my engagement ring because it was my hubby’s grandma’s ring, so it was an heirloom 🙂 The something new was my jewelry, although you could argue my dress and veil were new, too…….The something “borrowed” was a penny my sister gave me to tape to my shoe, which, unbeknownst to me until after my wedding came off of my shoe and retaped itself to the fifth step from the bottom of the staircase I walked down….How it got untaped and retaped is a mystery to me but number 5 has always been my lucky number! I “think” I had something blue on my garter but I just went and looked and it was just all white so maybe I had added a blue ribbon that came off? I don’t know! LOL

4. What one thing are you determined to do this summer? I am determined to stay out of the 100+ degree weather as much as possible…..everything else is kind of just up in the air at this point!

5. Ice cream or Popsicles? It depends on my mood, I don’t eat either of these THAT often…..I think when it’s hot outside, I actually would prefer snow cones or slurpees actually…

This is last week’s questions since I missed that week….and I was going to double up, but this week’s questions haven’t been posted yet! Therefore, there may be another post later today or tomorrow with this week’s questions.


As always, you may answer these questions in your own post or in the comments section!

This 5 Question Friday was brought to you by:

On to the questions!

Last Week’s Five

1. What advice would you give a couple getting married?  Marriage is NOT meant to be a fairy tale and if you are going into marriage thinking you will ALWAYS get along, then you’re in for a rude awakening…After you’re married for a bit, you’re going to get out of that lovey dovey feeling you had constantly that blinded you to every negative thing about each other, it WILL get to be harder to keep up your relationship and you WILL have to work at it to continue to make it work….BUT it’s worth it to work at it, nothing good ever came from just standing back and let things just work for themselves now, did it? 🙂

2. If you could tell your 16 year old self ONE thing, what would it
You ARE beautiful, no matter what people say to you and don’t let your life be controlled by the fear of acceptance because there will ALWAYS be those that do not accept you, first and foremost, always believe in yourself and accept yourself and who cares if everyone else doesn’t?

3. What do you do to keep cool in the summer? (AC, windows, fans, swimming, etc.)   Stay indoors as much as possible with the Air Conditioner or Fans! 🙂

4. What did you (or your wife) crave most while pregnant? N/A because I have yet to ever BE pregnant….but I hope to be before I’m 30 🙂

5. Who is your favorite TV mom? Why? As cheesy as this sounds, I can’t really think of one off hand…..When I think of the best MOM, I think of MY own Mom and the ones on TV just can’t compare!

No, this is NOT a post saying I’m getting a divorce or anything! I am still happily married and I plan to be until death DOES part us, so for friends and family who may have freaked out seeing the title, have no fear.

BUT this post is about Marriage and something I read considering it this morning. As I was browsing my Facebook news feed, I came across a post on a proposed ordinance in Mexico City, Mexico that would allow people to enter into Temporary Marriages. Yes, you read that right? “Temporary” as in the choice to be married “until death do us part” or as many years as you choose, with the minimum being 2 years. Before marriage, child custody and property is decided. The hopes of this ordinance is to reduce the numbers and cost of divorce.

My first thought was shock, honestly. I was born and raised with the belief that Marriage was this eternal vow and you just make it work. However, as I got older, I realized that there ARE some very valid reasons for divorce and I don’t judge people that end up in one. I have people very close to me that have been through them and having heard their situations, I can’t honestly say I would have chosen any different than they did. One thing I believe we all have in common, though, is that each one of us married with the intention of it being a “Forever” thing. None of us were blind to the idea that things can happen beyond your control and the future is unknown, but we each went into marriage with the idea that we loved this person, wanted to spend our lives with them, and we would be willing to work on our relationship should the need arise. Obviously, some of them ended up in heartbreak when the day came that they realized their hopes for a “Happily ever after” were shattered. I grieved along with them because I could tell they were so hurt and didn’t want that to happen. At the same time, I think most of them , should they re-marry, would choose to say “Until Death do us part” all over again. Why? Because I don’t think most people go into Marriage knowing OR wanting it to be a TEMPORARY commitment.

So, as you can tell, I am very torn about this proposal. I know this is just Mexico and it hasn’t been passed, but part of me hates the idea of something like this ever becoming a new trend. Maybe I am still old fashioned and traditional. Maybe I am living in a dream world where I still believe Marriage is a sacred thing, whether lasting or not, that to put it in terms of being “Temporary” is almost sacreligious?

Yes, I am aware that Marriage is an institution that hasn’t been around forever, but I kind of think I like it. I like the fact that two people are so much in love, maybe even drunk on it, that they agree to make this huge commitment of sharing their lives with one another. If I went back in time and had a choice to put a time period on my marriage, I wouldn’t take that option. If my husband had wanted that option, I would have refused to marry him. I would feel like it was a big slap in my face that someone chose to marry me, but it was only for 2 years or 5 years or whatever time. Then when the time ended, you can renew the marriage, but what would that really mean? Do you now have to do the whole dating and getting to know each other again period so that the other will agree to remarry you? What if one year in to a two year marriage, your spouse sees someone else they want to start seeing and is like, “Hold on, I got one more year and then I am free and clear with no messy divorce!”….Is it only me that would be offended by that? Am I the only one that would think your marriage now has become like a warranty on a product? Let’s just try it out for a couple years and if you’re not the same as when I married you, I will trade you in for a newer, better model?

I would prefer a couple live together for years and THEN make a decision to marry, then marry temporarily.

And now I will just say that I accept differing opinions on this. I realize to some people, this could be beneficial. I am simply stating my reasons for finding it rather atrocious and appalling. BUT, if you disagree with me, I am fine with that.

{July 19, 2011}   Two year wedding anniversary

Today, me and my husband share our second wedding anniversary. It seems like we were just married yesterday, though! Where does the time go?

In honor of our anniversary, I wanted to go back to the day of our wedding and talk about it a bit as well as post some of my favorite pictures of the day. I’m not offended if you’re not interested in reading or seeing the pics but if you are, enjoy! I have just wanted to sit down and chronicle the day for my memory at some point and the time is now!

Date: July 19th, 2009

Location: Castle on the Lake in Jacksonville, Texas

Time: 3 in the afternoon

I did some things traditional and some things definitely not so traditional. I ordered my dress online without ever trying it on which apparently is a no-no, but I just KNEW it was the one at first glance. After receiving it in the mail and putting it on for the first time, I looked in the mirror and smiled so big. I felt beautiful, like a princess and I was getting married, one of my lifelong dreams!

I already had the colors picked out since I was a kid. My favorite color has always been purple so I wanted to just do different shades of purple. I envisioned purple dresses for my bridesmaids and maid of honor and I knew I wanted those little flower leis for the top of my flower girl’s heads. Everything had to be done on a budget, though and my bridesmaids didn’t have tons of money to spend. So I went shopping to find the bridesmaids dresses. The first one I found was for my husband’s sister. I bought it on sight without her trying it on. I just knew it would fit her and I was right. Another of my bridesmaid’s  dresses came from a niece that had a dress they had bought for a friend’s quinceneara. I had a friend that was super tiny that could fit it and it was the exact style I had dreamed of. Only my maid of honor picked her own out and when she found it, she got me to look at it and agree on it. When I saw HER dress online, I was like, WOW. It was exactly what I had pictured her wearing. I was so excited….all the dresses were like puzzle pieces coming together and fitting perfectly. I know it’s not proper to have different fabrics on the bridesmaids but I think it came together very nicely. The first time I saw all the dresses together was at my wedding and it came together better than I could have dreamed. All different shades of purple, but all long gowns. They were all sleeveless, some with spaghetti straps,some with bigger straps and some strapless altogether. Each of them ended up having a inverted V shape in the bottom half where it opened up to a piece of fabric underneath.

The guys all wore suits they owned except for my hubby, who bought his. He looked so handsome!

The place we had the wedding had a package that included the cakes, both the bride’s and groom’s, as well as all the chairs, little gold birdcages for decorations, extra napkins, whatever drinks we wanted(we picked sodas cause my family wasn’t into alcohol). My cake was a 3 tier cake with purple roses and strawberry flavoring inside. At the top of the cake was a carriage with the groom outside helping his bride out. The groom’s cake was a U.T. cake because my husband was a fan of that team, NOT because he went there. It had a creme brulee? flavoring and chocolate covered strawberries on it. YUM!

I bought my bouquet online to save money and all the flowers were purchased from Hobby Lobby. I decided real flowers was something I could live without. I also bought my unity candle holders which were two horses and a carriage online, as well as a wedding castle guestbook. I actually bid for these on Ebay and got really good deals. Way cheaper than if I had paid full price. Because the wedding started at 3 and was over at 6, we opted to only serve cake. Again, we were on a budget. There was a special honeymoon suite we could have stayed overnight at the castle, but we used what that would have cost to pay for about 4 nights at the hotel in San Antonio. I don’t regret this decision at all.

Probably one of the most extravagant buys for my wedding that I purchased was a 3 column stand up picture frame. I saw it at Hobby Lobby and immediately knew I wanted it for my wedding so I saved up and bought it. We had me from childhood to then on one side, my hubby as a baby until then on the other and our engagement photos along with other couple photos we had taken in the middle. I just loved it. We also had a picture where people could sign around the outside. Not everyone must have noticed it because not everyone signed but we had some friends and family members that did and it now hangs on our living room wall.

I remember walking down the wooden steps to the aisle where my dad escorted me to meet my husband at the altar. I was crying, but they were tears of joy and I saw the same tears in my husband’s eyes. I remember the officiant(my brother-in-law) whispering that I looked beautiful and it made me smile. I remember all the thoughts rushing through my head as I saw myself surrounded by all the people I love. I remember our moms having issues with the lighter not lighting as they try to light their individual candles. I also remember being so worried beforehand that I might trip down the stairs or that our unity candle would blow out, but the worry was for nothing. I remember the penny in my silver flip flops(couldn’t wear my heels because my feet swelled up too big) coming off on the steps without being noticed and later finding it on the 5th step face up taped to the step. How it got untaped from my shoe face up, fell off and retaped itself to that step, I will never know. I remember my husband stumbling over his lines about the wedding ring and everybody letting out a much needed laugh to chase the tears away. I remember being fed the piece of cake by my new husband and my veil getting stuck in the picture behind me. I remember the sweet maid of honor speech my best friend gave and trying not to cry. I remember wishing the bouquet to land in her arms and it did. I remember my youngest great nephew all swallowed up in his little tux looking too precious for words and dreaming of the day when I will hold a “little one” of my own. I remember seeing my “pimped out” car and thinking, “Payback will come” to all my nieces that partook of the pimping out. And…I remember taking your hand in mine on that day, dear husband and looking into your eyes. I remember our first kiss as husband and wife and the way I felt repeating it in my head over and over that I was now a wife. I remember it all and for a moment, I almost want to relive it again….but only if I could fast forward past the long process of planning and stress. Just to relive the happy moments and not the sad, like seeing a best friend who was a bridesmaid crying at my wedding. Finding out from her that she had just found out HER husband was cheating on her. Hugging her tightly and crying with her on the biggest day of my life and not caring that maybe others would think it wrong for her to have told me then. I respect her so much for not wanting to burden me with her pain on “my” day but my best friends ARE me. I’m never more important than them, they are the ones who are there for me and help me up when I am down. I took the appropriate time for letting her know that I truly cared and went through the rest of the reception feeling heart broken for her and I will always remember that moment. I don’t regret taking time away from the day to do this and I will never be upset that she told me that day.

It was a good day and it had a sad turn, but I don’t regret that day for anything. If I could go back, knowing everything I know now about married life, would I choose to take a different path? No….my immediate response is no.

I love you, Chad and Happy Anniversary!

This slideshow requires JavaScript.

If you’re reading this before the first part, you may want to go back and read the first part of my Honeymoon gone wrong, also lovingly known as The week I got banned from Motel 6.

The rest of my Honeymoon may not seem as exciting as the first part but it was definitely interesting, to say the least. The first night in San Antonio, I laid in bed for hours unable to sleep as my sick husband snored his head off beside me. It wasn’t his snoring keeping me awake because snoring doesn’t really bother me. It also wasn’t a case of insomnia because I was incredibly tired and wanted sleep so bad. The problem was my body refused to LET me sleep. Every time I would get still enough to fall asleep, it seemed a minute later, my body would jerk and jump and wake me back up. I could feel my pulse racing and it was almost like restless leg syndrome, except all over, not just my legs. It scared me because I had never experienced it before but I also felt like it could be from stress. To say I had experienced a lot of stress in a short time was not an understatement. I eventually ended up calling my mom and telling her what was going on. I think she was kind of freaked out when I told her what was happening and was on the verge of making Chad take me to a hospital if it didn’t stop. After her advice of taking a warm shower to rest my nerves, I laid down and fell asleep quickly. Moms do sometimes know best, huh?

The next day was rather a lazy day…my hubby was still sick and I was having sinus headaches and losing my voice. In fact, that next day was ending up rather normal until I decided to take some Advil for my head. I had made the mistake of leaving the medicine in the car and it had melted and then stuck together. I broke apart a chunk of 3 Advil to take but couldn’t separate the 3 any further. No problem, I can swallow those giant “horse” pills easy so I figured there wouldn’t be an issue. But then they made it about halfway down my throat and…got stuck. I stood up and tried to straighten my neck and push the pills from outside my throat with my fingers  to coax them down but they just were not having it. I could feel my air being blocked off and I couldn’t get myself to gulp or swallow anymore. My husband was across the room and noticed me struggling. Within a split second, he was doing the Heimlich Maneuver and out came the Advil. Afterwards, I started crying when I realized what just happened and I was just completely overcome with emotions. My new husband, not even 3 days in, had just literally saved my life!

I was very proud of him at that moment and I still AM when looking back on it. How many people can say they had a near death experience on their honeymoon and their new husband saved their life?

After that moment of our honeymoon, everything else paled in comparison. We obviously didn’t get to go to as many places as we would have liked due to money issues and we spent a lot more time being lazy than probably exploring San Antonio due to illness, but we had fun, nevertheless.

We also had our “Old married couple” moments too….there were a lot of little fights over directions and how we should spend the money, but looking back I am also proud that we made it through such difficult times as newlyweds. I see a lot of couples now that I don’t think would have made it through some of the things we have been through.

It was also a honeymoon full of being really sick and then feeling better, getting lost more than once and then finding our way back, both on the road and our way to each other. It was a crash course of budgeting for our new life together and a test to see whether we could do it or not. A near death experience that brought us closer to each other than before. Tied in to everything, a funny inside joke that tied our motel and hotel rooms together. At Days Inn, we had a toilet that never stopped running…but at least it flushed and we even gave the toilet a pet name and told it repeatedly to hush when it would start running. Hey, you got to laugh about something when things aren’t going perfect, huh?

The day before we headed back to the “real world”, we took a drive through “Devil’s Backbone”. While we were stopped at a small picnic area taking pictures and just admiring the view, this older couple stopped to do the same. They held each other’s hands as they crossed the road and went over close to us to take in the view. Noticing our car, they asked us if we were newlyweds, which we replied that we were indeed. They then offered us congratulations and I couldn’t help but smile as I saw how much in love this older couple still seemed to be. It was a great moment as our honeymoon was close to the finish. That scenic drive was my favorite part of our honeymoon. Other than using gas to drive it, it was 100% free!  But just driving along with my new husband, chatting away and enjoying the view….it was such a quiet, special, private moment for both of us. One that I am sure we will both treasure as well.

As we headed home on the final day of our honeymoon, I was feeling better but ready to start our new life together. Our honeymoon definitely had some not so glamorous moments but it’s nice to be able to laugh about the bad parts now that they are in the past. The negative aspects have all become a thing to joke about and a funny story to tell people and hopefully even our kids someday. We spoke our vows of “For better or for worse, for richer or for poorer, In sickness and in health” and shortly after, we got tested on how serious we truly took those vows. While I definitely didn’t enjoy the hard times in the least, I can be grateful looking back on them because it proved to me not only how much I loved my new husband and how seriously I took my vows but it also proved to me the same about him. Our honeymoon was this great big test of our relationship and it may have been rough sailing, but I think we ended up passing in the long run. 🙂

WARNING: This post includes a section that may not be good to read if you are eating or have just recently ate…in other words, watch out if you have a weak stomach!

They say Life makes for some good stories and although I have told some of my friends some specifics about my crazy honeymoon, I have never sat down and done a full post about it…until now. People always warned me that things would go wrong on your wedding day and for the most part, it was pretty smooth, although there were a few minor things but that could be a whole other post in itself. Suffice it to say that apparently having a fairly great wedding must have thrown my life out of balance too much and they say something’s got to give….well, it definitely GAVE when it came to my honeymoon.

I guess you could say the omen of a bad weekend started as we drove off with a little over $100 in our pockets and about $50-60 in Target gift cards….all that had to last us for the whole week so we were starting off on a limited budget honeymoon. Our hotels were already paid for though so at least that was not a concern. As we left our wedding venue, we got no further than a 3/4 of a mile down the road and had to pull over due to a loud racket coming from the roof. Turns out, the balloons tied to my car antennae were causing the antennae to attack my roof…we had to get them cut off so we could continue down the road to Motel 6, where we were staying for the night. A lot of wedding guests called and inquired if we were alright as they zoomed past us on the road. “Yes, we’re fine, the decorations on my car were attacking us…that’s all!” and off we went….another mile and stopped in a McDonald’s parking lot to take off the noise making devices from our bumper. After the threat of an exterior attack by what some prankster family members deemed decorations, we were on the road to the motel.

We got there finally, tired because I had slept virtually none the night before and I was losing my voice. It could have possibly have been from having to raise my voice some….not that I did it a lot ~cough cough~ but maybe that was why. My new husband was also exhausted and newly sick. I didn’t make him sick…his mother, step brother and one of his nieces were at my wedding with some kind of stomach virus which I didn’t know about until AFTER and my husband apparently caught it from them. So my honeymoon night involved me as the going hoarse and exhausted wife and him as the upset stomach, running back and forth to the bathroom, husband. Such fun!

In the middle of the night, we discovered our toilet refused to flush. Since there was no plunger, we were both tired and I didn’t feel like calling the front desk, I figured I would just leave it for the housekeeper to deal with. We would be up early and heading on the road to San Antonio anyways, so why bother?

I woke up the next morning grumpy, still hoarse, still tired and realized my husband had “gotten sick” and left a mess in the bed. I had no cleaning supplies obviously and we were on a limited budget which I was in no way willing to waste a dime on for this situation. I used towels, water, soap, whatever I could find and cleaned up after my sick husband. Yes, I was grossed out but I still loved him. He was sick, not his fault!

We grabbed up our stuff, checked out and headed out on the road. Apparently it had rained the night before so the colorful and entertaining sayings on my vehicle were almost completely washed off. The sun was up and I was in good spirits considering everything. The day was looking up…or at least I thought so. We had to make a stop in the city we got married at to drop off our marriage license. The way certain things were going, I didn’t want to trust the mail to get it there safely and I was afraid it might get lost if we waited. So marriage license turned in and everything official now, we got back in the car and I started to get the directions from Jacksonville to San Antonio….only one problem….no directions! Where were the directions? I could have sworn I got them from the hotel room but obviously not…..I must have left them behind. Oh well, we decided to change our plans a bit. Since we were both sick, albeit of different afflictions, and I didn’t exactly have any medicine for either with me AND the limited budget….we decided to drive the hour back to where we lived and get some medicine and we would then look harder for the directions AND coupons I had found for the trip.

In all honesty, this didn’t bug me too much. I had my nieces in from Indiana and my 2 great nephews that I didn’t get to see very much at all. I kind of looked at it as an excuse to see them a little longer. Once we got there, we met my mom and nieces/nephews at Wal-mart and my mom offered to get us a few things for the trip. We ended up getting a medium sized cooler and some crackers and snacks for the road. We cleaned the car out good and no luck on the directions or coupons. It was either print everything out again or go back to the motel.

I finally gave in and called the motel. They seemed nice and helpful as they asked what room we were in and said they would go check. After a bit of a hold, the manager appeared on the line and started yelling at me. According to him, we had left the room a horrible mess, there was “shit” on the walls and everywhere and the toilet was left full. He HAD found some papers but they threw them away because of the state of the room and I was BANNED from Motel 6 for the rest of my life. I got off the phone in tears and drove over to my Nanny’s to see my mom and family again. I was still bawling when I arrived there to tell my story of the Motel 6 manager. I was horrified! He made me feel filthy, gross, disgusting. The only truth to what he said was the toilet being full because it wouldn’t flush! I cleaned up that room as best as I could and there was no “shit” on the walls! What a ridiculous, horrid thing to say! Apparently as I was carrying things out of the room, I must have laid the papers down on the desk and forgot to grab them back up. After all, I had ALOT on my mind, you know?

Thanks to my wonderful mom and my nieces, I calmed down enough to go back to my parent’s house and reprint directions and as many of the coupons as I could. I was still incredibly hurt by the words I was told over the phone and I couldn’t help but feel like I was dirty even though I knew what the man had said were lies and nowhere near the truth. My niece Beckah mentioned calling the Motel and hollering at them for the way they treated me…I don’t remember if she ever did but I wouldn’t be surprised. She’s an awesome woman…I’m incredibly lucky to have her as a niece AND a best friend.

We headed back on the road after everything was printed and ended up at our hotel in San Antonio around 8 or so that night….It was extremely rainy and windy but we made it there safely. That place was way nicer and I would definitely stay there again. Days Inn at WindCrest, you are awesome! 🙂

The rest of the honeymoon was definitely hard with the budget and being sick…stay tuned for a part 2 later……

et cetera
Everything Mommyhood

Travel | Family | Deals | Beauty | Food | Life

Worldwide EndoMarch

The Global Endometriosis Uprising

Waiting for Baby Bird Ministries

infertility, miscarriage and pregnancy loss

Worth the trouble

“He couldn’t see why people made such a fuss about people eating their silly old fruit anyway, but life would be a lot less fun if they didn’t. And there was never an apple, in Adam’s opinion, that wasn’t worth the trouble you got into for eating it.” ~from Good Omens

Under Reconstruction

Hope isn't an emotion, but a daily choice.

Thought Catalog

Thought Catalog is a digital youth culture magazine dedicated to your stories and ideas.

The Ideal Me by 24

Smile! You’re at the best site ever

Becoming Cliche

My Journey to Becoming My Mother

My Trousers Rolled

"I grow old...I grow old...I shall wear the bottoms of my trousers rolled..." -- T.S. Eliot, The Lovesong of J. Alfred Prufrock

More Cabaret

Class, Sass, and a Lot of Ass

Book Lovers Buffet

Load Up - You Won't Gain a Pound!


Ideas about English, Drama and ICT in the classroom, as well as some broader musings

readful things blog

The search for meaning, one page at a time

101 Books

Reading my way through Time Magazine's 100 Greatest Novels since 1923 (plus Ulysses)

Body Rebooted

On the road to optimal health!