TheRealSharon's Blog











{March 12, 2013}   Finding the Past in Cleaning

I feel like today has been a very productive day. After living in our apartment for 3 years(how time flows!), our bedroom’s walk in closet hadn’t really been organized or cleaned since we moved in. It seemed like I had to wade through a huge mess of clothes and coat hangers to get to the very back and our “walk in” closet was more of a “wade in” the clothes closet! I had been considering doing something with for forever and today, I had the perfect opportunity. My mom is talking about doing a garage sale soon and due to my weight loss, I have clothes that swallow me plus I’ve had clothes in my closet that I just don’t really care for me anymore that I’ve been wanting to do something with as well. So it started with going through my side of the closet, pulling clothes I wanted to get rid of, and boxing them up. As I did this, I was able to slide my clothes further back and create more hanging space on my side of the closet. Then I emptied the underwear drawers, getting rid of any “delicate” pieces I could no longer wear(mainly bras) and got those re-organized. Lastly, I picked up all clothes from the floor, separated them as needed and found about a million coat hangers that had fallen to the floor! Geez! Now our closet IS a walk-in closet again! 🙂

While cleaning up, I found clothes that had fallen off hangers and hidden themselves under the rack. Clothes I forgot I had and was excited to see again. My husband was surprised to see an old shirt he had thought he lost and we found several clothing items of his that were way too small for him now that also went to the garage sale boxes. When all was said and done, I had 2 big boxes for the garage sale. It’s interesting how you always find things from the past when you clean, things that bring back memories, some good and some not so good.

Going along with the theme, I was shocked to see a friend request on FB today from someone from my past. Someone I thought I would never hear from again and I was honestly ok with that. Back when I was 16 years old and new to the Internet, I ended up in a chat room where I found a guy who lived in England. We talked and talked and when all was said and done, we had a long distance relationship for a couple of years. I was young, very naive and in love. When the chance to go on a Missions Trip to Wales, UK came up, I signed up to go NOT for the Missions aspect but because I thought I would have a chance to meet the guy I was so in love with. A few months before the trip, he dumped me and shattered my world. I remember feeling like he wasn’t really sorry for hurting me and I suffered a young girl’s heartbreak. It was too late to back out of the trip and not lose all the money, so I went and I don’t regret it one bit. I admit there was a few moments where I thought of him on the trip and it hurt knowing I wouldn’t be seeing him but I believe now it was all meant to be for me to go on that trip and I am so grateful for the experience.

I never expected to have a friend request almost 13 years later from him, though. According to his profile, he is married and it looks like he has some kids. I am happy for that but I admit curiosity to why he felt the need to reintroduce himself to me. If you’re curious, I haven’t accepted the request. In fact, I’m going to deny it. I plan to leave him a message asking WHY he felt the need to send me a friend request though and then I will let him know that the past is the past, I’m married too now and I don’t want to think on the past. Besides, befriending him now would be uncomfortable for my husband and it’s not worth it to do that. I don’t know if others would agree with my outlook but I feel like it’s right for me. Sometimes people don’t make it to your future because they are meant to stay in the past. Finding things in our closet I forgot about was a welcome sight but finding old loves…..not so welcome.

*If you haven’t read about my Missions Trip before and are interested, click for part 1, part 2, and part 3 and here for photos!. 🙂



{March 2, 2013}   Date Day Posting

Posting this in the middle of my Date Day so this will be short and sweet. Today is my first official Date Day in months. Even though I spend all the time practically with my husband living together, it’s fun to go on special dates like you went on when you were just boyfriend and girlfriend, you know? My last date day was planned a couple weeks ago but I ended up sick so I was super excited for today. 🙂

Breakfast together, then off to the movies to see “Dark Skies” which surprisingly made me jump a few times. Must be something to do with the Alien theme? Honestly, I was raised on Monster movies and not many creepy alien ones so Aliens still seem to scare me, I guess. I thought the movie was pretty creepy and also good. You can find out my rating later when I post it on my 50 movies in 2013 page! 🙂

After the movies, we used a Chili’s Gift Card from Christmas to get some lunch and yes, I took a free day today so I ordered Pasta for the first time in a LONG time and I have plenty of leftovers. Then we came home and played some Scene It on the PS3…my husband beat me, of course! 😦

The rest of our day was supposed to be playing board games and maybe watching shows on the DVR, BUT turns out tonight is an A.C. Singers concert(which is a singing/dancing group I was in about 7 years ago…has it been THAT long? wow!). I’ve missed the past couple years cause I always forget to check and they change the dates every year…..so I am excited to go tonight! We are taking my Mom with us, too, though, (my idea) cause she loves these concerts and I know she doesn’t get to do as much since she is living with my Nanny and taking care of her all the time.

So…off I go to get ready for the concert, then maybe me and the hubby will watch some DVR shows to end our Date Day off nice! 🙂



{February 23, 2013}   Life isn’t a Fairy Tale

The first definition of a “Fairytale” is just what it sounds like, a story about fairies told to amuse children. The other definition given is an interesting but highly implausible story, often told as an excuse; as in when someone makes up a story to get out of something, for example. The very definition of the word tells you that it’s something fictional and not real yet from the time we are little girls we believe in a day where we can run off, get married and live like in a fairytale. The whole idea sounds lovely, but if you look at the examples from most fairy tales, are they really that ideal? Something horrible usually happens before the supposed happily ever after which seems to be the key thing we dream of. We all want our “Happily ever after”, never considering that this lovely ending in fairy tales could just be a clever way to say “The End” while making you feel all happy inside.

Now let me first clarify that this is NOT coming from a scorned woman who feels like she missed out on her fairy tale. I am happily married and I love my husband very much. I believe in the power of love and I believe that two people can stay in love throughout their marriage, go through the bad and come out better and grow old together. I simply disagree with the notion that life can be a great big fairy tale.

Let’s look at the elements OF a fairy tale. They always start with “Once upon a time”. Well, in that way, I guess we can agree. All our lives started once at some time or the other. Secondly, you always have a hero/heroine and a villain. Well, in real life, there are many villains all around you. Some people have more villains in their paths than others; some get conquered by a hero or heroine, even if just metaphorically speaking; others aren’t so lucky and lose out. Good doesn’t always win over evil in real life.

Third, we have magic. I believe a little in the supernatural and that we have a type of magic or power within ourselves, but I don’t believe people can turn an actual pumpkin into a carriage or that mice I encounter will talk to me and then sew me a dress. If there are mice that can do this and I am unaware, PLEASE let me know! Then…we have royalty usually in some way. We definitely still have kings, queens and princesses around as shown by the royal wedding, BUT the royalty of 2013 is very different from what it was when fairy tales were first told. In fact, WHEN they were first told, it wasn’t all rainbows and butterflies then! A queen was more liable to get her head cut off than be happy with her king, who was probably bedding several mistresses right in front of her!

Next, fairy tales always have some kind of problem and solution. In this case, I can relate but real life seems to have never ending problems and the solution doesn’t come from magic. Real life is tough and while it’s nice to believe you can just be happy forever and never be sad, angry or hurt again, it’s not true. You DON’T get married and then everything be sunshine from then on. Things are going to happen, LIFE happens. You can’t avoid that fact.

Lastly, fairy tales always have some kind of lesson, with the main one usually that good conquers evil. Ah, fairy tales, how I envy that good always wins out in you! If only in real life good could always win. If only sickness would always lose, if people wouldn’t ever hurt you, and you wouldn’t have to face death. But life isn’t a fairy tale.

Having said what I don’t agree with, I will now say that I still appreciate fairy tales also for what they are. Fairy tales give people hope, which is something hard to always keep in this day and age. Hope is important to have regardless of the situation. It’s good to believe the best of mankind and hope that in the end, good WILL win out, even when it doesn’t.

Life ISN’T a fairy tale but it IS a story. A story that YOU fill out by every step you take, every word you say and everything you do each day. You have the power (or magic) to decide how you’re going to deal with what life throws you and what people will say when they read YOUR story. So while your life may not read as a fairy tale, you can still let your life read as a GOOD life well lived. A life of someone who tried to do what was right, who loved whole heartedly, and tried hard to make this world the type where good DOES win out in the end.



Welcome!

As always, you may answer these questions in your own post or in the comments section!

This 5 Question Friday was brought to you by:

On to the questions!

1. What holiday do you wish did not exist? I don’t know…there’s not really any holidays that come to mind that I dislike

2. What is your favorite romance/love movie? “The Notebook” I can’t help it, I just love that movie!

3. Do you make a big production out of celebrating Valentine’s Day? Nah, not really…just get my hubby a card and something else to go with it and he gets me a card and a present…sometimes we go out to eat, sometimes we stay home

4. What is something weird you did as a child? (or even now!) When I was little, I liked to hang around in the house in just my underwear….I have no idea why, I just did!

5. What makes you love your husband, really LOVE him, you know since Valentines is coming up? He knows how to cheer me up and he makes me laugh 🙂 Oh and he gives the best bear hugs!

 

 





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{September 6, 2012}   I was Born to Love you

Twenty eight, almost twenty nine(omg!) years ago, I was born. I was born a baby girl, a daughter, a sister and an Aunt. Ok, so if you want to get all technical, I wasn’t really born an Aunt. I became an Aunt at the age of 2 years and about 2 months, though so I honestly can’t remember a time that I wasn’t one. I remember holding my first niece and being so excited cause I just LOVED babies. Getting to hold one was for me like YOU getting a brand new car or diamond ring. I thought it was the coolest thing ever and although, I can’t say I vividly remember my words, I can see in my mind being told this baby was my niece and me pointing and smiling while saying, “Niece! Niece!” This wasn’t one of my baby dolls or a picture. This was MY niece.

As the years have passed, I look at my role as an Aunt as the most awesome gift ever. I know people who are Mommies and they always say they never realized how strong love could be until they saw their baby for the first time. Well, I haven’t yet become a Mommy so I don’t have that experience to compare to. I can see and hear the love in a Mommy’s voice and the way she treats her child, though and I can honestly say, in my opinion, I feel my love for my nieces and nephews is the closest possible thing I know right now next to what I can only imagine being a mother to be.

And I know some mothers may fight me on my feelings and say I have no idea, and I can’t completely disagree because I DON’T have a child. Regardless, I DO know what love is. I have love for my parents and love for my siblings and love for my husband, all different in some ways, but all strong. I also have love for my nieces and nephews. I know it’s cliche to say “I would jump in front of a bullet for someone” and you could argue that no one really knows what they would do until put in that situation, but I WOULD jump in front of a bullet for ALL of my nieces and nephews. And I will fight anyone tooth and nail that wants to argue with me there.

I realize not all Aunt and Niece/nephew relationships are as strong as what I feel. No offense to anyone in my family reading this, but the aunts and uncles I have are great, but do I feel AS close to them as I would LOVE to believe my own nieces/nephews are to me? No, I don’t…that’s just me being honest. It may have a lot to do with a majority of my nieces being fairly close to my age and living close to me for a good part of their lives. I don’t doubt that has an influence on my feelings for them but the ones who are further away from my age, I love them JUST as much.

When I think of the WHY, I really attribute it to the simple fact that I have NEVER known what it’s like to NOT be an Aunt. (Forgive my double negative there! Bad grammar alert!)

I know what it’s like to NOT have a husband because I spent 25 years of my life as a single person. After being with my now husband for a while, my heart expanded and I fit a new love into my life. I know what it’s like to NOT have my own child, because I am motherless at the moment. When I have a child, I expect my heart to grow yet again to find room for another love. My heart has never had to grow much to find room for nieces and nephews, although many have come throughout my life. From the very first moment I can remember of my life, I WAS already an Aunt. My heart already had a section that was ready to be filled with all the additions that would come. It wasn’t something new to get used to, because I never knew a time when it wasn’t part of my life.

Let’s picture it another way. I was born with my Mom in my life and I’ve never experienced my life without her. (And my sympathies go out to those who have lost theirs, by the way) I know there’s a chance someday she will leave my life and I will experience immense heartbreak. Even thinking of this for a second just kills me inside.

Well, this is how I feel as an Aunt. I have never know my life without nieces and nephews and as each one gets added, that part of my heart just grows and grows. I have always felt like losing one of my nieces or nephews would tear me apart. It wasn’t long ago that I lost two of them, although it happened before I could even meet them. It hurt but the hurt was more then just a loss because now it was not only losing two great nephews BUT knowing that one of my nieces was going through a heartbreak that I can’t relate to her about yet. It was incredibly sad to know the niece I once saw in diapers was experiencing such tragedy and there wasn’t much I could do about it.

I never want to lose one of my nieces or nephews AGAIN and I never want them to go through heartbreak. When they are upset, I hurt for them. I get scared when I think of any of them not only going through hard times BUT the thought that one of them might decide to EVER cut me out of their life or not want anything to do with me. It literally makes me want to break down in tears. There was a time when I felt so close to them that I didn’t think it would ever be a problem but as an adult, I KNOW how people grow up and change and drift away from you. I have had many old friends just fade out of my life and I don’t want that to happen with them. Each niece and nephew are like a puzzle piece of my life and whenever one is missing, my life doesn’t make sense. The puzzle is incomplete….and I am left feeling like a piece of my heart has been misplaced.

I was born to be an Aunt and love all my nieces and nephews. To all of you guys: I hope you understand that to me, I’m not just an extended family member. I was put in your life to be there for you, to listen when you need it and to always care. I was born to love you.



First of all, the 19th was mine and my husband’s anniversary. It was a good one and I am excited for many more! We had a gift card to Olive Garden but we didn’t end up eating there. Right as we got there and walked in, the power went out! I was actually surprised to see my reaction was laughter about the situation. All the restaurants and stores in that area had a power outage too, so we just decided on a whim to head for another town close by and try an Italian restaurant we had been dying to try for the first time. Right as we got into the restaurant, we found out the power in Olive Garden had JUST come back on. It seemed like fate to me. The other restaurant, called Antipasta’s was awesome, had delicious food and ended up being cheaper than Olive Garden would have been (without a gift card) so it was well worth the drive.

Yesterday was the first day of my new healthier life. It was hard but I feel like I have got this new found motivation I didn’t even think I had in me. Between meals, me and my husband went to play Mini Golf (which I hadn’t played in years). It was so much fun, but I am thankful there were benches nearby and we brought big bottles of water with us! After bending down so much to get the ball, my back was yelling at me and I was feeling really out of shape. I think more than fatigue, I just had to rest frequently due to feeling faint and my hands shaking, which I KNOW had to be due to blood sugar. I am NOT diabetic at the moment, I just had blood work done last week, but it runs in my family and my dad is hypoglycemic so I think I might have to figure out exactly HOW to best eat to keep my blood sugar from getting too low, you know? Before, unless I went hours without eating, it was never much of an issue because I was eating a lot of carbs that were probably fueling me with bad glucose? Now I am eating more fruits and veggies versus bread and pasta, but maybe I am not getting enough. This is kind of new to me, so I think I am just going to have to again, take it day by day and figure it out.

Yesterday as I was eating fat free yogurt for breakfast and not exactly digging it, I started to say something positive I wanted before each bite. For example, “I want to be healthier”, “I want to feel better”, etc. and before you know it, I was finished and found a LOT of inspiration for losing weight. I have decided to make short term goals and long term goals to aspire to. My first short term goal is to lose 50 pounds by Christmas but my real incentive there is to fit into my dress I wore for engagement pictures by Christmas. I was about 50 pounds lighter then and I would really love to fit that dress again! So now I have a pound goal but also a visual goal to aspire to and I really feel like it is certainly possible!

My first long term goal doesn’t have a “pounds” attached to it, but it’s something I want to accomplish by May. A couple years ago, when my niece Sara graduated, I was unable to sit further down in the stadium with the rest of my family because my butt was too big for the chairs. Therefore, me and my husband sat at the top in folding chairs. It really made me sad, though I just laughed it off about “my big butt”. This May, my niece Grace will be graduating high school at the same place and I want so badly to sit with my family this time. I’m tired of having to find somewhere to sit and sitting off by myself, feeling like a loner. I feel like I can also conceivably make this goal and I can already see the excitement on my face when I get there!

On another note, I am suspending my “12 in ’12” challenge because I feel like I already have one big challenge I am committing to, that is frankly, a lifetime challenge. Having a thyroid disorder means even after losing all the weight, I will STILL have to stick to a healthy lifestyle to avoid going back. I have lost a good bit before and I gave up when I got stuck….and now I am right back where I was and then some. I don’t want to go down the same path again. I have added two weight loss tickers on the side of my blog, one with my short term goal and one to just show my progress throughout my whole journey. I will keep updating you at least once a week and I already appreciate all the tips, advice, support and kind words that have come my way!



{July 19, 2012}   Third Year’s a Charm!

Happy Three Year Anniversary to my Husband! It has been three long roller coaster years, but well worth it!

On this day, I think back to not three, but four years ago on this day. Four years ago, I was awakened by a phone call. It was my then boyfriend(later husband) calling me to ask me out on a picnic. It registered in my mind that it was odd for him to be so spontaneous but we had been dating for almost 8 months at the time, I was hopelessly in love and I thought it was just the sweetest thing. A little tingle in the back of my mind wished for a proposal on that day or some day in the near future, but I honestly didn’t have much expectation of one.

You see, Chad and me had already talked about the idea of getting married someday, but we had also talked about the fact that he was broke and engagement rings were expensive. Seeing as we had only been together 8 months, I was fine with waiting because I knew in my heart it was going to happen eventually.

So, I got ready for him to pick me up and I told my parents(who I still lived with) where I was off to and they knew. Chad had called and asked if he could take me out on a picnic. This did seem strange to me, cause he didn’t usually do that. I met him and he showed me a mix CD he made for me with romantic love songs and an “I love you, Sharon” written on top. We listened to the CD as we rode to the park and I found the idea of a mix CD and a surprise picnic very romantic. We got to the park and he pulled out a rotisserrie chicken with rolls and potato salad. For the drinks, we had grape juice in champagne glasses. (Yes, I still have both THOSE glasses AND my wedding ones) The weather was wonderful, bright and sunny and we had our own little picnic table off by itself where you could see others, but we weren’t bothered by anything. He told me during our meal that he had got me this video game I had really wanted at the time(for the life of me, I can’t remember the name of it now) and he was going to get it out of the trunk after we ate. So I was anxious about that and admittedly, there WAS a small part of me that hoped there was something else for me in that trunk. We finished our meal and he went to get the “Surprise” and I heard him lifting the trunk and he told me to close my eyes. I believe I even said, “Why do I have to close my eyes? I know what it is!” but I humored him. I heard him walk up behind me and then he told me to open my eyes, so I did and I turned around to see him on his knees, with a ring case open to show a beautiful ring. I heard the words, “Will you marry me?” and I quickly responded in the affirmative as he slipped the ring on to my finger. I think I was in shock more than wanting to cry. I even asked him how he was able to afford a ring. It turned out his mom gave him his great grandma’s ring to give to me. Apparently, Chad was his great grandma’s favorite when he was alive and Chad’s mom liked me enough to allow him to give the ring to me. I felt this incredible feeling of happiness surge through me and I also felt pretty special that his mom thought well enough of me to let Chad give me that ring. I still remember feeling so giddy and excited and wanting to scream out to the whole world that I was engaged.

My parents already knew. He had asked their permission when he talked to them about the picnic. His parents knew because he had mentioned not being able to afford a ring but wanted to propose when his mom offered his great grandma’s ring. BUT there were other family members to tell AND friends and I sure enjoyed letting everyone know. I was so excited and I definitely wasn’t prepared to put a date out there yet. Everyone wanted to know the date and I was like, “I just got engaged, give me time here”. And I did take some time to really think about it. I knew I wanted at least a year or close to it because I wanted to make sure that it was the right decision and I didn’t want to rush. I also wanted time to plan as close to my dream wedding as I could afford. After much consideration, I decided why not the same day as I got engaged, but a year later!

Turns out that day was perfect even if it was on a Sunday. When I started looking at venues, I knew I wanted it to be in the afternoon so we could just do cake and save the expense of fun…3:00 sounded like the best to me and I needed affordable. I also had the dream vision of a castle in my head but in Texas? Well….shortly through looking at venues online, I found a castle within an hour of me, they had the date I wanted available, but not many other July dates around it. It just happened to be my lucky fortune that the day I wanted it was the day you HAD to have it for the least expensive package and it HAD to be at 3 p.m. AND the package I picked had recently been stopped BUT she accidentally gave me the wrong papers so I got to get that package anyways! It really felt like everything was working out perfect.

Today, it is 4 years since the day he proposed and 3 years since we said ” I do”. I am hoping these next few years will be full of many more happy memories.

I am going to be doing a weekly or bi-weekly post about love and/or marriage, just talking about married life and love and things I have learned and discovered in my short 3 years of marriage. I hope everyone will enjoy it, so stay tuned! The first post will be coming soon! 🙂



{December 26, 2011}   Goodbyes are hard to do

Today, my family from Austin and North Carolina left. I see the ones from Austin at least a few times a year, but the others, not so much. My newly married niece has been in town for a little over a week and before that, it had been almost 3 years since I had seen her. I hopefully will see her next year sometime but that seems like a long way away now. When I hugged her bye, I held her tight and said I wasn’t going to let her go so she couldn’t leave. Words I said both seriously and with humor to try to keep myself from crying. Sometime during the hug, I realized she was about to leave and I have no guarantees of a next time. None of us are even promised tomorrow and when saying goodbye, the truth of that rings clearer than ever. She let go before me and I tried to keep her close even as I knew I had to let go. As hard as it is, I had to. I then turned and faced the wall as the tears started to flow. I didn’t want anyone to see or hear me cry so I walked off to bid the tears adieu. I somehow stopped them and was able to gain the courage to keep them from overtaking me. 30 minutes after they left, she sent me a text message saying she missed us already and it made me want to cry again. She responded to this with, “I haven’t stopped.” 😦
I have no idea how I avoided crying again when I read that but I did. I suspect had I not been surrounded with my family from Indiana who are still here until Thursday, I would have burst out into tears. After Thursday I will say bye again and try my best not to cry. I may or may not be successful at not crying in front of people, but I know I will after they leave. I will be left feeling empty and sad missing them until I can get back to the numbness of missing them without the tears coming everytime I think about it. I love seeing my family but I hate ever so much to say goodbye.



{October 26, 2011}   Weekly Photo Challenge:Opportunity

Double posting today!

For me, I wasn’t sure what pictures to post this week. Last week’s Possibilities felt like almost the same as this one, but then today as I wrote a post I am saving for tomorrow, I realized what I wanted to post. Sometimes life brings you opportunities and you take them and you’re rewarded, sometimes not. Other times, you may miss one or choose not to take one and you may regret it. Not always, though, there can be alternatives. You may skip an opportunity and end up realizing it was the right choice after all. The thing is, you never really know until afterwards. You never know until you take the risk. So you can take it or leave it, but if you take a risk and regret it, at least you have gained wisdom from it, right?

I have had missed opportunities in my life, for sure, but I choose to not regret them, and instead learn from them just like mistakes. One huge opportunity we all have each and every day is to tell the people closest to us how much we love them. To miss an opportunity to tell someone we love them is, I think, the biggest regret you can ever have. Today, I am posting pictures of some of the people I love most in my life and taking the OPPORTUNITY to say, I love you!

For all my family and friends that may not have pictures here, I love you! And to all my blogging friends, I also love you! 🙂

*Not all pictures were taken by me, some were taken by other friends and family*

My niece Lydia and her husband Dru on their wedding day! 🙂 Wish I could have been there!

4 generations....Counterclockwise from Right, My mom, my oldest sister, my oldest niece, my Nanny, and my oldest great nephew

My 3 youngest nieces BEFORE I got married

My two youngest nieces NOW 🙂

My mom with my youngest great nephew(who is now 3)

My husband 🙂

My nephew...being silly 🙂

My best friend Tara, on the left...and me on the right<---Photo booth pic

My niece/best friend Rebekah

A lot of these are older pictures that I randomly picked…hopefully no one gets mad at me for using their pictures! I love you all!



et cetera
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