TheRealSharon's Blog

{February 5, 2013}   Good Fortunes

Yesterday, I ate Lunch at a Chinese Restaurant and at the end of the meal, I was given a Fortune Cookie, which has become pretty traditional, although NOT Chinese in origin. I never eat the cookies due to never acquiring a taste for them, but I always enjoy reading the fortune inside. When I read the fortune, I felt like it was a perfect one for me! My fortune said: “Don’t be pushed by your problems. Be led by your dreams.”

I believe this to be a perfect fortune for me as well as a great saying, too. So many times in my life, because of depression, I have focused only on the negatives and all the problems in my life and let them control me and be the focus in how I live. Even people without depression can sometimes focus TOO much on what’s wrong and forget to remember the important things. A lot of times my issues push me in the direction of taking a backseat on things or NOT getting out there and striving for what I want most. I talk myself out of going for what I really want because I constantly think of what I CAN’T do and all the problems that might arise along the way. Because of this, my problems literally PUSH me away from my dreams instead of towards them. I have to learn to follow the path I need to take to do what I love and really desire even if it scares me.

So, today, I dropped off resumes at 13 different doctor’s office in the hopes of acquiring a job answering phones and/or doing basic clerical skills with the future hope of becoming a full fledged secretary or receptionist. It’s not blogging for a living, but it is a job that I feel drawn to and I have a strong desire for. I truly enjoy doing clerical work and it makes me happy. In the back of my head, I worry that I won’t be good enough or I’m not as qualified as I believe I am, but I push away that doubt and KNOW that it’s something I want to do and I know that I’m a determined individual who CAN and WILL work hard and to the best of my ability. Writing and blogging are still what I love even more so I will continue to go after those dreams as well. Why not go after ALL the dreams you have for yourself?

I will be keeping this fortune close so I will always be able to give myself the reminder to not be pushed by my problems, but to be led by my dreams! I love how sometimes the boost you need the most can come not from eating a cookie, but a message inside a cookie. 🙂

I just want to let those that are following my weight loss and becoming healthier journey that I am STILl going strong, day 6 and I have managed to get close to 1200 calories everyday without going over and no more than 30 grams of carbs per meal, just like my doctor prescribed!

So far, I have noticed my stomach is giving me less problems and I am less sore in my muscles than before when I would walk around a bit. I have also noticed that these past six days have been so much happier and less depressed feeling for me. I have so much hope and joy that I forgot I was capable of and I almost feel like the old me who was so much more full of life. I have NOT weighed since last Saturday when I saw no change on the scale. I decided for this first week to wait until this Friday to weigh. It’s really hard because I am impatient but I want to give my body time to show changes and my metabolism hopefully to kick in. There has been only a few times where I have felt down but I have been able to quickly get those thoughts out of my head.

I am so looking forward to all the changes this journey will bring me through and I am very optimistic that although the process is hard, it will be worth it in the long run. Part of this new found hope I believe comes from all this support I have received from people, both close to me and not as close. It means so much to know people care and WANT you to succeed. Knowing all of you truly are behind me through this has given me what I need to start really believing in myself again. I CAN DO IT!

I will let you know my first weight check in on Friday. I would LOVE to see a big number, but I am trying to keep myself realistic and if I can even see a 2-3 pound weight loss than I will be ecstatic.

et cetera
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