TheRealSharon's Blog

To play along, just answer the following three (3) questions…

• What are you currently reading?
• What did you recently finish reading?
• What do you think you’ll read next?

What are you currently reading? Vampireville(Vampire Kisses, #3) by Ellen Schreiber-I have honestly had pretty much NO time for reading this past week and more to come on all the reasons why later this week….

What did you recently finish reading? Nothing because I have had no time to read and I apologize for not having any real NEW information here

What do you think you’ll read next? Your guess is as good as mine! Christmas is now 4 days away and I will be busy with family until sometime next week so I may not be doing much reading for awhile…at least I am replacing it with some fun family time, though! 🙂

I hope everyone is having fun getting ready for the holidays! Even though I MAY not have much time to read, I would love for you guys to drop a comment with your favorite Christmas themed or Holiday themed books of all time…or maybe just your favorite book you have read during the holidays at some point! 🙂

Wishing all my blogging buddies safe and Happy Holidays!

I know this is probably supposed to be a more recent picture, like one taken this week or the past month, but I’m going to cheat and use a couple of older ones. Just because I like them better! My blog, my rules, right? 🙂

Me doing the peace sign...this past March

Oct. 2010

2008....I look so much skinnier and YOUNGER! AH!

Since next Monday will be the day AFTER Christmas, THIS Monday will be dedicated to Christmas and Holiday Jokes! 🙂 Enjoy!

Signs You’ve Had Too Much Holiday Cheer

1. You strike a match and light your nose.

2. You take off your shoes and wade in the potato salad.

3. You hear a duck quacking and it’s you.
Christmas Elf
4. You tell your best joke to the rubber plant.

5. You refill your glass from the fish bowl.

6. You hear someone say, “Call a priest!”

7. You start kissing the portraits on the wall.

8. You complain about the small bathroom after emerging from the closet.

9. You ask for another ice cube and put it in your pocket.

10. You tell everyone you have to go home… and the party’s at your place.

11. You have to hold on to the floor to keep from sliding off.

12. You pick up a roll, and butter your watch.

13. You yawn at the biggest bore in the room… and realize you’re in front of the hall mirror.

14. You take out your handkerchief and blow your ear.

15. You suggest everyone stand and sing the national budget.

Some Musical Christmas Advice:

Make out your Chopin Liszt early before Debussy season, when you have time to check out Verdi good bargains are, can still get gifts Faure good price, not have to Handel large crowds and have time to give Bach things you decide you don’t want.


Ten Worst Gifts to Buy A Woman(With added thoughts by Moi!)

1. Never give a woman any kind of household appliance or something that is going to make “housework” easier. For instance, a blender, a toaster, a new vacuum, one of those mops they advertise on tv that does everything but suck the life out of you, anything in a informercial. One allowed choice is a new washing machine with a turbo spin cycle. (In all honesty, I wouldn’t even want the washing machine really…..getting appliances for Christmas is like, “Merry Christmas”…Now there’s no excuse to do housework!)

2. Any bulk cleaning supplies, “honey, I got you that large box of Tide you have been wanting.” “This Windex should last you a while.” “I got a good deal on the industrial strength toilet bowl cleaner.” All I can say is, be prepared to run. I have faith that if you would have at least stopped and thought about what would be a much more intimate gift, you would have had the sense to spring for the $5 Chia Pet you were eyeing in Kmart. (Seriously….since when are cleaning supplies a good idea for a gift? The only time I would accept a cleaning “gift” is if it’s given to me with my husband’s offer to DO the cleaning FOR me!)

3. Any sharp objects made by Ronco which slices or dices, or a set of ginsu knives. These may one day be used as a weapon against you when you come home with lipstick on your collar after a “night out with the boys.” (IF my husband DID come home with lipstick on his collar…this is very true…but I much prefer the frying pan method….)

4. Do not buy gifts for yourself and pretend they are for her. “Honey, I’m sure you’ll get a lot of use out of the new drill I bought you.” By then she will have put it to good use by drilling a quarter inch hole into the side of your skull for even thinking she would accept such a lame gift. After a gift like this, you probably won’t be around for NEXT Christmas. (This would be fine if I could turn around and buy my guy jewelry for myself…LOL)

5. Any lingerie made of flannel, such as a pair of feet pajamas with a trap door in back. A Little Mermaid or Barney cartoon character nightgown. It gives her the idea that you do not consider her the beautiful woman that she is. Take out that wallet and buy her something sexy from Victoria Secret (just like you did for your mistress or other girlfriend). (First of all…he better not have anyone but ME and second of all…cartoon character pajamas are only OK if she requests them or has an obsession with one of them…)

6. No name perfume which costs you $1.99, such as Eu de Toilet, which actually smells like the bathroom, moldy fruit, or your dirty socks. If you are going to buy her perfume, spring for the brand names. (In all honesty, I do not mind the no name brands and feel they smell pretty much the same…but if a man can afford to splurge a little, it IS nice. )

7. Any type of cubic zirconia jewelry you see on the Home Shopping Network. It will be quite embarrassing when she is showing off that fabulous diamond to her friends and tries to cut glass with it. (We actually test them you know.) Also, now would not be a good time to buy her that set of diamond nipple clamps you always wanted to, you know how we like to show off our jewelry and it could get embarrassing at the New Year’s party when she decides to show them off to your buddies. (I actually resent this comment because I’m not a snob, I don’t have to have the best of the best and don’t test my diamonds….if it’s not real gold or silver, it WILL turn my finger green though…but like I said with the perfume, it’s not that big of a deal to me….BUT if a guy HAS the money, it IS nice to splurge…if he doesn’t…it’s understandable to me although I’m sure not ALL women agree)

8. Please do not buy her clothes because you think for one minute you have good taste in woman’s clothing. Well, perhaps you might if you are a transvestite, but all in all, believe me, she’ll smile and say its beautiful while choking back tears and mumbling under her breath, “were the hell would I ever wear this outfit without being arrested for bad taste?” An additional hint, plaids do not go with stripes (even though you think your golfing outfit looks just fine). It’s a known fact to the rest of the world that that is a taboo. In the Northeast, thats like wearing white after Labor Day. (very true….just give me a gift card or money instead! LOL)

9. Do not give her a gift certificate to Jenny Craig or Weight Watchers. Most men would know better, especially the ones who have learned the correct response to “do these pants make me look fat.” If you are one of the poor souls who still doesn’t get it and purchased a gift like this, be prepared for the silent treatment for a month. (Although that may be something you would actually look forward to.) A better alternative would be hiring a Chippendale dancer as a personal trainer to get her motivated into getting fit. (NOW we are talking! 🙂 Even if the women says she wants to lose weight or have a membership, I would agree that THIS is just not the best idea for a gift!)

10. Last but not least, never buy a woman anti-wrinkle cream, or a book on “How not to be Nasty Sunday through Saturday.” These are not considered gifts, they are considered reasons for seriously injuring the person who bought it and just may stand up in court of law. (Yea…not sure what they are meaning by the book title, but no wrinkle cream for me!)

*Women…I suggest making a list for your man! ;)*


Every Christmas morning, when my kids were little, I read them the nativity story out of the big family bible.
When my son was old enough to talk, he asked me what a stable was.

I thought for a moment how to explain it to him in terms he could understand, then told him, “It’s something like your sister’s room, but without a stereo.”


As a little girl climbed onto Santa’s lap, Santa asked the usual, “And what would you like for Christmas?”
The child stared at him open mouthed and horrified for a minute, then gasped: “Didn’t you get my E-mail?”


Santa Stats

There are currently 78 people named S. Claus
living in the U.S. — and one Kriss Kringle.
(You gotta wonder about that one kid’s parents)

December is the most popular month for nose jobs.

Weight of Santa’s sleigh loaded with one Beanie Baby
for every kid on earth: 333,333 tons.

Number of reindeer required to pull a 333,333-ton s
sleigh: 214,206 — plus Rudolph.

Average wage of a mall Santa: $11 an hour.
With real beard: $20.

To deliver his gifts in one night, Santa would have to
make 822.6 visits per second, sleighing at 3,000 times
the speed of sound.

At that speed, Santa and his reindeer would burst into flame


To All Employees
From Management
Subject Office conduct during the Christmas season

Effective immediately, employees should keep in mind the following guidelines in compliance with FROLIC (the Federal Revelry Office and Leisure Industry Council).

Running aluminum foil through the paper shredder to make tinsel is discouraged.

Playing Jingle Bells on the push-button phone is forbidden (it runs up an incredible long distance bill)

Work requests are not to be filed under “Bah humbug.”

Company cars are not to be used to go over the river and through the woods to Grandma’s house.

All fruitcake is to be eaten BEFORE July 25.

Egg nog will NOT be dispensed in vending machines.

In spite of all this, the staff is encouraged to have a Happy Holiday.

Christmas is a time when you get homesick – even when you’re home.  ~Carol Nelson

One of the most glorious messes in the world is the mess created in the living room on Christmas day.  Don’t clean it up too quickly.  ~Andy Rooney

Love is what’s in the room with you at Christmas if you stop opening presents and listen.  ~Author unknown, attributed to a 7-year-old named Bobby

I wish we could put up some of the Christmas spirit in jars and open a jar of it every month.  ~Harlan Miller

Christmas is the season when you buy this year’s gifts with next year’s money.  ~Author Unknown

No matter how carefully you stored the lights last year, they will be snarled again this Christmas.  ~Robert Kirby

The worst gift is a fruitcake.  There is only one fruitcake in the entire world, and people keep sending it to each other.  ~Johnny Carson

Wouldn’t life be worth the living
Wouldn’t dreams be coming true
If we kept the Christmas spirit
All the whole year through?
~Author Unknown

And the Grinch, with his Grinch-feet ice cold in the snow, stood puzzling and puzzling, how could it be so?  It came without ribbons.  It came without tags.  It came without packages, boxes or bags.  And he puzzled and puzzled ’till his puzzler was sore.  Then the Grinch thought of something he hadn’t before.  What if Christmas, he thought, doesn’t come from a store.  What if Christmas, perhaps, means a little bit more.  ~Dr Seuss

This is something I got from a forward and loved and decided to pass on!


There was 

a blind girl who hated herself because she was blind. She
hated everyone, except her loving boyfriend. He was always there for her. She told her boyfriend, ‘If I could only see 

the world, I will marry you.’

One day, 
someone donated a pair of eyes to her. When the bandages
came off, she was able to see everything, including her

He asked 
her, ‘Now that you can see the world, will you marry me?’ The
girl looked at her boyfriend and saw that he was blind. The
sight of his closed eyelids shocked her. She hadn’t expected
that. The thought of looking at them the rest of her life
led her to refuse to marry him.

boyfriend left in tears and days later wrote a note to her
saying: ‘Take good care of your eyes, my dear, for before
they were yours, they were mine.’

This is 
how the human brain often works when our status changes.
Only a very few remember what life was like before, and who
was always by their side in the most painful situations.

Life Is a 


before you say an unkind word – Think of someone who can’t

you complain about the taste of your food – Think of someone
who has nothing to eat..

you complain about your husband or wife – Think of someone
who’s crying out to GOD for a companion.

before you complain about life – Think of someone who went
too early to heaven..

whining about the distance you drive Think of someone who
walks the same distance with their feet.

And when 
you are tired and complain about your job – Think of the
unemployed, the disabled, and those who wish they had your

And when 
depressing thoughts seem to get you down – Put a smile on
your face and think: you’re alive and still

{December 17, 2011}   I Still Believe in Santa Clause

I really do still believe in Santa Clause, only not in the way everyone thinks. I stopped believing in the fictional character years ago as a child, although, I quickly learned from my mom that kids that don’t believe do NOT get gifts so I pretended the character was real even though I knew the truth. Even though everyone KNEW I knew the truth.

I never felt lied to when I discovered the truth behind the fictional persona of Mr. Clause. At least not that I remember, which means it didn’t scar me or anything. I don’t remember feeling betrayed as I learned the true identity behind the Easter Bunny or Tooth Fairy either. It just seemed like a natural progression of going from make believe to reality. I don’t think there is anything wrong with kids believing in fairy tales or make believe. In fact, I think it’s important for children to have that innocence as long as possible, before they learn that life will not be a fairy tale and it can be very rough. I wish more than anything that ALL children could live in a fairy tale reality for as long as possible. The horrible truth is that many children are forced into a cruel reality of life too young and I think the happiness fairy tales can bring is a welcome relief.

But, back to my belief in Santa Clause. My mom told me as a young girl that Santa Clause was the Spirit of Love and Giving. As long as that exists, Santa Clause exists. That’s what I believe in…The Spirit of Love and Giving. Not the fictional man in red with a belly full of jelly that says HO HO HO. The IDEA of Santa Clause. The Spirit of the Holidays that fills our hearts with love and joy and a giving spirit. I feel this spirit when I see people doing good deeds around the holidays, when I see someone helping someone who’s in need, or giving all they have asking for nothing in return. To me, that is what Santa Clause stands for.

You probably have heard on the news or online about the people around the U.S. that have been secretly paying off layaways, mostly ones with toys and kid’s clothes, for people. To me, those wonderful people, are someone’s secret Santa Clause. So many are doing it out of the spirit of giving without asking for reward or fame. Just secretly helping others out that might otherwise be unable to afford to give their kids any gifts. Thank you, Secret Santas! You reaffirm my hope for this world and let me know there are STILL good people out there willing to do good! 🙂

I still believe in Santa Clause because I see small town and big city Santas everyday spreading the spirit of love and giving to one and all!


As always, you may answer these questions in your own post or in the comments section!

This 5 Question Friday was brought to you by:

On to the questions!

1. What’s the best Christmas present you’ve ever received? As cheesy as it may sound, the first thought that honestly popped in my head is the years that ALL my family was here…..this year, I am going to see all my siblings and all my nieces and nephews, even though one niece and her new hubby will be coming in a few days after Christmas. It really is a great present to me that all these people are going to be here in 8 days! I am overflowing with excitement! Presents are just secondary to getting to see my family 🙂
2. Worst/Funniest White Elephant gift ever received? It has been SO many years since I participated in a White Elephant gift that I honestly can’t remember even ONE gift I got from one of these….
3. Is your Christmas tree plain and simple (white lights and matching ornaments) or is it wild and crazy (colored lights with lots of ornaments collected over the years)? My tree is artificial with already pre-strung lights, but I have various ornaments…the problem is I have a lot of figurine type ones that are HEAVY and they weigh the branches down, so I can’t use all of them like I would like….My Nanny gave me a bunch of Teddy bear ornaments, little mouse ones and some snowman ones that are adorable, but like I said, heavy….she also gave me some lightweight hummingbirds with flower ones that I use, they are VERY colorful….and then I have a couple santa faces, partridges, doves, and turtle doves, bells, etc. random little ones…..My mom has hundreds of ornaments at her house but since she has been staying with my Nanny all the time, she won’t be putting up her tree….there are ornaments on my Mom’s tree that are handmade from me when I was a kid and little ones I consider mine…some Precious Moments one and others like that, but I have a smaller tree so I’ll probably wait to steal some of mine back from her…If I ever get around to it…
4. “How” do you iron your clothes? The old fashioned iron/ironing board way, the shower, back in the dryer, etc. I have never really ironed anything…I have an iron and ironing board and they don’t really get used…I don’t have a really good reason for not using it, not sure why….when I lived at home, I just put it back in the dryer
5. How much baking do you do for Christmas and what are your “must make” items? The only thing I have ever really made during the holidays was Macaroni & Cheese…and I made that on the stove, not baked…I’m not a big cooker and I am kind of afraid of the day when I might have to be in charge of holiday cooking….I know how to cook and I’m good at it, but it’s just not my thing…I don’t like to cook…I avoid it as much as possible…BUT I did make cookies yesterday! 🙂

{December 15, 2011}   Weekly Photo Challenge:CELEBRATION

I have a lot of photos that make me think of celebrations and parties, BUT I really tried to find pictures that fit the theme that I haven’t used before on my blog. So….here are the photos I picked out and hopefully you feel the sense of celebration that these photos make ME feel! 🙂

Karaoke at my friend's birthday party!

This picture was taken at my close friend’s birthday party a couple years ago….her and my husband were singing “Walk the Line” by Johnny Cash. This photo brings back laughter and great times because my husband is NOT a great singer, but he loves to be silly. He ended up singing many songs or attempting to and being crazy with it and I laughed so much at this party because of him! 🙂

My niece Grace...many years ago

This picture was taken when my little niece Grace was turning nine years old and she still liked to be called “Gracey”. Now she is almost 17 years old. I just love the memories this picture brings back with her closing her eyes, getting ready to make a wish and blow out the candles.

Nothing says Celebration like Fireworks, right?

This is a random picture of Fireworks I found on my computer and it was screaming out to me, “I fit Celebration!”….and it was labeled FIREWORK…come on, who doesn’t love that word? It sounds like someone is going to fire work, you got to love THAT idea! The epitome of celebrating is getting rid of work!

A collage of my old engagement pictures...celebration of love 🙂

I already posted a picture of my tree this year…except I didn’t have the ornaments on yet….so I will add a photo of my tree the first year I put it up at our then new apartment.

Christmas 2009-our first Christmas together as husband/wife 🙂

So much to celebrate that I could literally go on forever adding pictures and I hope to have many more “celebration” theme pictures throughout the years to come! 🙂

To play along, just answer the following three (3) questions…

• What are you currently reading?
• What did you recently finish reading?
• What do you think you’ll read next?

What are you currently reading? Vampireville(Vampire Kisses, #3) by Ellen Schreiber-I didn’t have time to read much this week…these books are pretty short and easy reads though, so I was able to actually start and finish it!

What did you recently finish reading? Dance with a Vampire(Vampire Kisses #4) by Ellen Schreiber

What do you think you’ll read next? I plan to start 11/22/63 by Stephen King next, but not sure how much time I will have for reading over the holidays

{December 13, 2011}   Making Progress



Slowly, but surely I am getting things done. I started yesterday working on my important list and I have completed cleaning my den/computer room, got the decorations out of the closet, almost have my living room done, the tree up sans ornaments and my guest post done and sent in. To some, this may not seem like a lot, but for me, it’s an accomplishment. I still have a good bit to do in the next few days to prepare for the holidays, but it feels really good to look at the progress I have made and know I didn’t let procrastination win.
And in less than 30 minutes, it will be 10 days until Christmas Eve! The day when my oldest sister, 3 of my nieces and my great nephews from Indiana will be here. The excitement of their visit is putting me in one of the best moods ever. 3 of them I haven’t seen since my wedding, 2 1/2 years ago, so this is a long anticipated visit.
I hope everyone is having fun getting ready for the holidays and I wish all of you the happiest of holidays and good health! 🙂

{December 12, 2011}   Mirthful Monday-Cleaning Edition

I’m in Super Maid Cleaning Mode this week so I need all the laughter and cheer I can get…and why not share it with all of you? This week’s dose of joy is dedicated to Cleaning! 🙂

Signs I need to Own for my Kitchen:

1. Kitchen closed – – this chick has had it!
2. Martha Stewart doesn’t live here!!
3. I’m creative; you can’t expect me to be neat too!<——Exactly!
4. So this isn’t Home Sweet Home… Adjust!
5. Ring Bell for Maid Service…If no answer do it yourself!
6. I clean house every other day…. Today is the other day!
7. If you write in the dust, please don’t date it!
8. I would cook dinner but I can’t find the can opener!
9. My house was clean last week, too bad you missed it!
10. A clean kitchen is the sign of a wasted life.

Good Housekeeping Tip:

Always keep several get well cards on the mantel…..

So if unexpected guests arrive, they will think you’ve been sick and unable to


Is  housework and chores keeping you away from the internet?  Here are some sure fire short cuts that will have you back online in no time!

1)Simply close the lid of the toilet. Close the shower door or curtain. For the illusion of a freshly cleaned bath, pour some Lysol in the trash can. That should hold you until you finally get someone to empty the trash.

2)Laundry ?  Find a good place to hide it! Turn your clothes inside out and they will last another week.  For odors……spray with cologne.  If you absolutely need to do it, like you have no underwear (heck who needs underwear), wash them then stick them in the dryer. When it is time to fold them, DON’T!  Just run the dryer to get out the wrinkles when you need new clothes

3)Call up a salesman for a vacuuming demonstration. Have him show you how the vacuum works in all parts of the house. Insist that even though the carpet looks the same, it really is different in all parts of the house.  Some valuable tips for success: Don’t always call same company, keep a chart and rotate.  If there are any stubborn spots that require scrubbing recruit the cat. You may have to add some tuna water to spot in order to insure a thorough job.

4)If it doesn’t come off in the dishwasher, call grandpa to come help.  He’s always willing to do anything for you. For really stubborn crud, just throw the dish out and start fresh. An even better idea, use paper plates, plastic utensils, paper napkins, etc. Write everyone’s name on the plate or cup so they can use it over n’ over n’ over.

5)Mowing problems solved!  Raise goats for some extra income. Set them loose in the yard and they will keep the grass trimmed nice and neat. Plus they’ll eat any of the debris that gets in the yard. Sell them in the winter, then you can start with a new bunch in the spring


Smith goes to see his supervisor in the front office. “Boss,” he says, “we’re doing some heavy house-cleaning at home tomorrow, and my wife needs me to help with the attic and the garage, moving and hauling stuff.”

“We’re short-handed, Smith” the boss replies. “I can’t give you the day off.”

“Thanks, boss,” says Smith “I knew I could count on you!”


Q: Why don’t men do laundry?

A: Cause the washer and dryer don’t run on remote control!

Sign in a Laundromat over the washers:



It’s Not the Detergent That Gets You

A young boy, about eight years old, was at the corner “Mom & Pop” grocery picking out a pretty good size box of laundry detergent.

The grocer walked over, and, trying to be friendly, asked the boy if he had a lot of laundry to do.

“Oh, no laundry,” the boy said, “I’m going to wash my frog.”

“But you shouldn’t use this to wash your frog. It’s very powerful and if you wash your frog in this, he’ll get sick. In fact, it might even kill him.”

But the boy was not to be stopped and carried the detergent to the counter and paid for it, even as the grocer still tried to talk him out of washing his frog.

About a week later the boy was back in the store to buy some candy. The grocer asked the boy how his frog was doing.

“Oh, he died,” the boy said.

The grocer, trying not to be an I-told-you-so, said he was sorry the frog died but added, “I tried to tell you not to use that detergent on your frog.”

“Well,” the boy replied, “I don’t think it was the detergent that killed him.”

“Oh? What was it then?”

“I think it was the spin cycle!”


And, for a last laugh 🙂

10 Rules Of Housecleaning

1. Don’t vacuum too often— it weakens the carpet fibers. Say this with a serious face, and shudder delicately whenever anyone mentions Carpet Fresh.2. If disturbed, dust bunnies cannot evolve into dust rhinos. Rename the area under the couch “The Galapagos Islands,” and claim an ecological exemption.3. Layers of dirty film on windows and screens provide a helpful filter against harmful and aging rays from the sun. Call it an SPF factor of 5, and leave it alone.

4. Cobwebs artfully draped over lampshades reduce the glare from the bulb, thereby creating a romantic atmosphere. If your husband points out that the light fixtures need dusting, simply look affronted and exclaim, “What? And spoil the mood?”

5. In a pinch, you can always claim that the haphazard tower of unread magazines and newspapers next to your chair provides the valuable Feng Shui aspect of a tiger, thereby reducing your vulnerability. Roll your eyes when you say this.

6. Explain away the mound of pet hair brushed up against the doorways by claiming you are collecting it there to use for stuffing hand-sewn play animals for underprivileged children.

7. If unexpected company is coming, pile everything unsightly into one room and close the door. As you show your guests through your tidy home, rattle the door knob vigorously, fake a growl and say, “I’d love you to see our Den, but Fluffy hates to be disturbed, and the shots are SO expensive.”

8. If dusting is REALLY out of control, simply place a showy urn on the coffee table and insist that “THIS is where Grandma wanted us to scatter her ashes.”

9. Don’t bother repainting. Simply scribble lightly over a dirty wall with an assortment of crayons, and try to muster a glint of tears as you say, “Junior did this the week before that unspeakable accident. I haven’t had the heart to clean it.”

10. Mix one-quarter cup pine-scented household cleaner with four cups of water in a spray bottle. Mist the air lightly. Leave dampened rags in conspicuous locations. Develop an exhausted look, throw yourself onto the couch, and sigh, “I clean and I clean, and I still don’t get anywhere.”

Hey, it’s better than actually CLEANING!

et cetera
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