TheRealSharon's Blog

I love my computer. It allows me access to a plethora of information, right at my fingertips. I also hate it for the same reason…..sometimes having access to so much can be TOO much. There are times when I want a simple answer or response and a million appear, making me have to wade endlessly through subjects and titles that have nothing whatsoever to do with what I wanted other than sharing a letter or two with what I typed in.

Why can’t you read my mind, computer? I feel as if I have to play guessing games with you at times to get the kind of response I so desire! How must I word my Google search to best get the results I choose? Maybe they should start offering classes on how to effectively search without wasting hours of time.

I love you, Computer, for giving me the blessing of being able to interact with my friends and family that live far away. If it were not for you, I would probably not be as close to some of them as I am now.

I also wouldn’t know all those little steamy details my friends post on Facebook every time their spouse, significant other or current fling says or does the wrong thing. I have a bird’s eye view at not only what they do on the weekends but sometimes I get very interesting photographic proof. I wouldn’t know every time one of my friend’s babies goes potty for the first time, gets their first tooth, says their first word(Heaven forbid it be a curse one!) or any of those other little details. I even sometimes have the very enviable position of getting a play by play when a friend goes into labor…..Some things I enjoy, other things are overshare, thank you very much!

I love how I can log into Facebook and chat with whoever is online. I hate when there’s one person I want to chat with on but then there’s that other person that makes me want to appear invisible. You know who I’m talking about, right? There’s always that ONE person who always has something to say. They could be locked in a empty room for a year and when you let them out, they would STILL be talking non stop. I don’t mind chatting every once in awhile but there’s just sometimes where I AM trying to do something else, believe it or not! It’s not like I get on just to chat…

Convo. Example:

Talker: Hi there, how are you doing? What’s been going on lately? 

Me: Hey….I’m doing  good, thank you. Currently working on my blog, that’s about it. Not much else…How are you?

Talker: I’m doing great! You’ll never believe what happened the other day! OMG! So and so totally told so and so that so and so was this and this and so and so…..etc., etc., ad nauseam….Can you believe that?

After 2 minutes I have yet to respond because I am busy doing other things…

Talker: Well…Can you believe that? It was so rude of so and so to say that and I can’t believe so and so did that….what are you doing?

Me: No…totally can’t believe it, how rude!….I’m just working  on my blog, checking my e-mail and Facebook…the usual.

Talker: Oh….Yea, well anyways. Did you hear about this person?(another story about someone)

A minute goes by and I haven’t said anything….

Talker: You there?

30 more seconds…

Talker: Sharon? Are you busy?

Me: Yes, I am here (Insert My response to her other story) No, I’m not busy…just working on my blog so it takes me a minute to respond

Talker: Oh…ok.

(I could continue but basically the gist goes that the person will continue to tell story after story in which a minute or two will go by without MY response and the “Are you there’s” will continue over and over again until I come up with an excuse and log out.)

I don’t mind chatting while doing other things, but seriously…STOP asking if I’m there or where did I go or jumping to the conclusion that I am busy just because a minute goes by without a response. AND don’t ask 10 questions and give me 5 seconds to answer then freak out because it took me so long……It’s a computer chat, NOT a phone call or an in person chat!

Back to you, dear computer….I love how you keep me entertained with games, blogs to read, quizzes to take, news to read, etc.

I hate how you drag me into something really entertaining and then decide to play games with my mind by freezing unexpectedly or displaying an ominous error message. You always seem to choose the worst moments to do so, too. Almost as if you’re a living, breathing entity out to annoy me instead of a machine.

I also hate how you possessed my mouse. I’m not sure how you managed to but whenever I’m in the middle of something and it’s unsaved….the mouse magically moves from the middle of my screen right over that red x in the corner and my click meant for doing something completely different now closes out everything. A howling is quickly uttered from either me Or my husband(whoever the lucky victim is at the time) which lets the other know that the mouse has struck again! I can almost picture a devil living inside my computer laughing at me during these moments. I also yell out suggestions of throwing my dear computer out the window…..I never do it, though. As much as I think it conspires against me at times, I also would rather deal with its stress than lose it completely.

There are days that you, dear computer, are like my best friend: Reliable, Trust worthy, loyal and kind.

There are other days that you’re my worst enemy: A betrayer and evil.

Your’e like the girl with the curl in the middle of her forehead. When you are good, you are good…but when you are bad, you are unbelievably horrid.

I have gone through both love and hate with you every day this week, at least once. We have a love/hate relationship that can’t be beat.

But no matter how much I know I will hate you at times, I will always go back to loving you, computer…..Why? Because you’re the gateway that led me to the site that led me to the man who I married. You should feel lucky you did so because otherwise, I swear you would be out the window right now!

et cetera
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