TheRealSharon's Blog











{February 21, 2011}   Sorrow hits the best of us

This post started out as something else but took a completely different turn…..

Death leaves a heartache no one can heal, love leaves a memory no one can steal.  ~From a headstone in Ireland

May Angels comfort and watch over you

I read some sad news today. One of my 2nd or 3rd cousins, I believe, on my dad’s side, lost her newborn baby boy today. : (    I think the last time I saw the girl was probably back when my dad’s mom passed away, so I wasn’t very close to her, but it’s still sad. She’s around my age…maybe a little younger and this is the 3rd son she has had to bury. I feel for her and her immediate family. I really do. It just seems to be more than any one person should have to go through.

I don’t even have kids yet and it seems to be something that would be too hard to bear. I hope this is something I will never have to know the pain of personally. I feel selfish saying that because I am close to a couple of people that DO know this pain. They are some of the most incredible, strongest women I know. One is older than me and the other just a bit younger, but I look up to both of them and admire them dearly for the strength they have shown.

One experienced the pain well before I even knew she existed, the other one it happened to when I was in her life as a best friend. Me and my mom used to watch her baby girl and she loved my mom so much. I think she started to see my mom as a second mom, in fact. I still remember the phone call saying there had been an accident. I remember telling my mom with tears running down my face. I remember being so scared and worried for my best friend. Nothing else mattered at that moment other than her. I know my hair wasn’t brushed. Not sure if my clothes matched; all I cared about was seeing about my friend. My best friend was going to make it but her baby girl was in bad shape. She eventually went to heaven right after her 2nd birthday. She wasn’t even my child and it broke my heart in a million pieces. My heart ached for my friend and it ached for the little girl that I considered an adopted niece. It was so hard going to the funeral. I didn’t want to cry a lot because I didn’t want to upset her worse. I had to try to be strong for her. She was the mother, this was her child, I have no right to be so sad when SHE is going through much, much more than me. So I built up the strength, tried to squash back the tears and I went. Then came time to see my friend and sorrow is a hard thing for me. I struggle with knowing what to say. Giving hugs and saying the right words has always be incredibly hard for me. This doesn’t mean that I don’t care and that I don’t genuinely feel for people. It’s just something I struggle with. I had never had to look into a best friend’s eyes and tell her I was sorry for her losing her baby girl. A best friend that was like a little sister I never had, but who would I be if I didn’t say anything? Everyone knew how close we were. What would they think? I HAD to build up the courage and say something. So I did. I gave her a hug and told her I was so sorry and I held back the tears. I wanted to turn away and get out of the building so I could go hide and cry. I didn’t want to cry in front of her. But SHE was the strong one. SHE was the brave one. She looked at me with a smile on her face and said,”Don’t worry, She’s with the angels in heaven now.” Suffice it to say, the tears came. There was a flood gate behind my eyes that wanted to unload right there and turn the room into a river, but I couldn’t let it. So I nodded my head, tried to smile back with the tears starting to flow and slowly walked away. The flood released after I left her side but she didn’t see. When I think back to that time, I still can’t believe how strong she was. I can’t believe to this day, how strong she still is.

And that was one child….my cousin has now lost 3. I just can’t even begin to fathom her pain and I hope to God, that she will be comforted by him and his angels right now. If you’re reading this blog, please pray for that with me.

It’s so curious:  one can resist tears and ‘behave’ very well in the hardest hours of grief.  But then someone makes you a friendly sign behind a window, or one notices that a flower that was in bud only yesterday has suddenly blossomed, or a letter slips from a drawer… and everything collapses.  ~Colette

Earth has no sorrow that Heaven cannot heal.  ~Author Unknown

Advertisements


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

et cetera
Everything Mommyhood

Mom Life, Reviews, Giveaways, Recipes, DIY, and more

Worldwide EndoMarch

Forward we go to end the silence for Endometriosis!

Worth the trouble

“He couldn’t see why people made such a fuss about people eating their silly old fruit anyway, but life would be a lot less fun if they didn’t. And there was never an apple, in Adam’s opinion, that wasn’t worth the trouble you got into for eating it.” ~from Good Omens

Problems With Infinity

Confessions of a Delusional Maniac

karenwriteshere

Hope isn't an emotion, but a daily choice. Keep choosing the path of hope.

Thought Catalog

Thought Catalog is a digital youth culture magazine dedicated to your stories and ideas.

The Ideal Me by 24

Smile! You’re at the best WordPress.com site ever

Women Who Think Too Much by Jeanne Marie

My book, Women Who Think Too Much, is available at smashwords.com

Becoming Cliche

My Journey to Becoming My Mother

My Trousers Rolled

"I grow old...I grow old...I shall wear the bottoms of my trousers rolled..." -- T.S. Eliot, The Lovesong of J. Alfred Prufrock

randomdescent

"writing is an adventure"

More Cabaret

Class, Sass, and a Lot of Ass

Book Lovers Buffet

Load Up - You Won't Gain a Pound!

re-Education

Ideas about English, Drama and ICT in the classroom, as well as some broader musings

readful things blog

colourful language, colourful opinions

101 Books

Reading my way through Time Magazine's 100 Greatest Novels since 1923 (plus Ulysses)

Insatiable Booksluts

Voracious readers tell you if that book is going to suck.

Body Rebooted

On the road to optimal health!

%d bloggers like this: